I Touch Myself
by ShovelChin
Summary: Gary accidentally admits something to Stan that he wasn't prepared for. Stary.


**I Touch Myself**

* * *

When Gary was assigned chores, he took them on happily without fail. He was glad to be of help to his parents, because he knew that they worked very hard to maintain a clean home. His siblings had a congruent mentality. Often times, they would clean up together, all singing a song so as not to grow bored with their work. It was always great fun, and they enjoyed the time they spent together – whether it be involving work or play. Today, on the other hand, his family members had other affairs. Whereas on most days, they'd spend their time with each other, today was a day when he'd been left to his own devices.

His parents had joined a book club so as to grow closer with the other residents of South Park. His older brother had long since moved off to college, where he called every other night to converse with his family. He'd called yesterday. Gary's eldest sister was attending a sleep over party. His younger brother and sister were attending a Mormon youth meeting, to which Gary himself could not come to, having been too old to join in. He could've went to the one for kids more in his age range, but frankly, there were only three members, and he decided it would be best to get some cleaning done while he could.

With that said, it was more than clear that Gary had no other family members to sing with him as he completed his chores, so he listened to his ipod and jammed out to it. His lips curved into a bright smile as he ran his vacuum over the floor, and Gary hummed very softly to his favorite songs.

Never far from his mind was Stan Marsh, one of his best and only friends, who flitted into his thoughts as the music played. While the beginning of their friendship had been rocky at _best_, over time it had blossomed into a closeness that could hardly be matched by any others. Gary would easily say that Stan was on the same level his family was by this point in time, even if the sentiment wouldn't be mutual. Or maybe it would have, as Gary was well aware that Stan wasn't exactly close with his family members.

Gary's humming gradually grew louder as he mulled over their plans for later that evening. They hung out frequently, perhaps not as frequently as Stan hung out with his other three pals, but still frequently enough for them to be considered counterparts. When Stan had discovered that Gary was alone in the house, he said he'd be over as soon as possible. Gary wasn't sure exactly what that meant, being that Stan's ambiguous promises of visitations could range from two hours to an entire day in wait time for Gary. Regardless, he occupied himself with cleaning as he waited.

The passage of time had been good to Stan Marsh. He _was_ cute when they'd met, but blossomed into an attractive and handsome young man. He was an excellent football player, and he even played Gary in tennis from time to time. Girls swooned over him and while he seemed all right with dating them when they asked, he was never particularly interested, and even when in an established relationship Stan rarely even so much as _saw_ the girl he was apparently with. He seemed rather indifferent to each one, and when they broke up with him, he was unfazed.

Eric Cartman, one of their good friends (more Stan's friend than his; Gary thought he was good at heart, but wasn't sure why he liked to cover it with an unkind exterior), liked to joke that it was because Stan was queer. Which didn't seem like quite strong of an insult to Gary, being that Eric had expressed in the past that he wasn't nearly as interested in females as he was males. Gary assumed that Eric made these jokes only so that he could insinuate Stan was with another boy, just to tease them both and poke at their nerves. The boy who usually got the other side of this joke was Kyle Broflovski, more likely than not because he always grew upset with Eric at these accusations (and would, in return, jab at Eric's relationship with Butters Stotch, or hint that he had something going on with his adopted brother, Scott Tenorman – this would spark extreme defensiveness on Eric's part that made Gary wonder even more).

...Sometimes Gary wished that Eric made jokes about Gary himself and Stan dating again, like he had when they'd first met.

Gary's parents had long since known about his sexuality, and being the people they were, they accepted him with open arms, despite it clashing _just slightly_ with their religion. Somehow, they were still just as loving as ever before. He knew that they weren't particularly proud, but he was happy that they didn't shun him. What they didn't know, of course, was who the object of his affections was, even though Gary had a feeling that at least _one_ of his siblings did. It wasn't as though he tried to hide it, but he didn't want to pursue it for fear of making Stan uncomfortable. If the other boy asked, however, he wouldn't lie. Lying was not a habit he never wanted to get wrapped up in. On top of that, part of him _wanted_ Stan to know.

The songs became more upbeat and as time passed, Gary discovered his hips swinging to the beat, one foot tapping while he ran his vacuum over the carpet meticulously. He began to mumble the lyrics, a grin developing over his face while he thought of Stan Marsh and how much he'd love to do a duet with his best friend. A certain song came on that reddened the tips of Gary's ears; the tune was a guilty pleasure of his, and every time he heard it, it made him think of late night endeavors with himself where he sighed out Stan's name into his pillow.

"I love myself, I want you to love me..." He quietly sang.

When the chorus came, Gary figured that he had nothing to lose, being that he was alone, so he sang louder.

"I don't want anybody else..." He happily sang, getting more and more into his dance. "When I think about Stan, I touch myself!"

He continued to sing, shaking his head back and forth as he shimmied his legs and ran the vacuum back and forth with the beat. The song was undeniably catchy as well as relateable, even if taboo on many levels for someone who followed the belief system that Gary did. He failed to notice the door opening.

"I get down on my knees, I'd do anything for you..."

Gary began to sweat from how hard he was dancing as he imagined himself actually on his knees, before Stan, the other boy commanding him to do anything and everything he wanted. Whether it be Gary getting him a cup of water, or cleaning, or doing _other things_, he'd be happy to please.

"I don't want anybody else!" He shout-sung with an ecstatic grin on his face. "When I think about Stan, I touch myself!"

He let go of the vacuum momentarily to run a hand through his hair, eyes closed. "I touch myself!"

The song faded away, music waning along with Gary's desire to dance. He turned to grab the handle to the vacuum once more, only for a pair of wide blue eyes to flash in his vision. Gary froze, face to face with none other than the person whom he'd been singing about; the other boy's mouth was wide, stretched into an exaggerated oval as he gaped, standing in the doorway. Instantly, Gary tore off his headphones and shut off the vacuum.

"Oh, uh- hey Stan! You're earlier than I expected. I was just finishing up some things my parents asked me to do. How's it going?" His lips twisted into a crooked smile.

...This had not been the way he'd wanted his affections to be discovered. But Gary assured himself that God always had a plan, and that this was fate unraveling for him, and therefore, he played along with it.

Stan continued to gawk at him, before he cleared his throat. "Dude." Was all he had to say.

"Hey, is something the matter, buddy?" Gary's tone was concerned, as though he hadn't just been singing about masturbating to Stan Marsh.

Slowly, Stan shut the door behind him, eyes drawn to Gary's form. "Dude," he repeated, this time continuing past that. "Do you actually?"

"Do I actually...?" Gary tilted his head, appearing entirely oblivious.

Stan's lips formed a tight line as he grew impatient, eyebrows furrowing. "Touch yourself when you think of me!"

Gary laughed, ignoring the bead of sweat that trailed down the side of his face. "Oh, that! Well, sure." He smiled innocently, reminding himself that honesty _was_ the best key. He hoped that this would have a good outcome for him, because if not, then to put it lightly, he was screwed.

"Oh." Stan responded curtly, most likely surprised at Gary's abrupt confession. He himself was, too; he'd expected something much different to play out. But perhaps if he acted as though everything was normal, it would be less... Strange.

"Yeah." Gary shrugged. "So, what do you want to do tonight?"

"Woah woah woah, no." Stan's eyebrows drooped into what bordered on a glare; he rarely glared at Gary. "No way, dude. Don't change the subject. You touch yourself to me!"

"Yeah, and?" Gary inquired, a cough rising in his throat. A confrontation he'd been awaiting was not transpiring how he'd hoped. Maybe this _wouldn't_ have a good end...

"So... That's like - does that mean that you're into me?" He asked cautiously, fingers tapping against each others' tips. Gary eyed them, knowing that Stan did this most when he was anticipating something important.

"Am I _ever_..." Gary's voice fell to a whisper, despite the perpetual happy undertone that remained present. He smiled sadly, right arm rubbing at the left. He would've preferred that Stan finding out about his infatuation would've gone differently, but he was willing to settle for this, if it meant anything changed for the better.

"Oh." Stan contemplated this for what teetered onto several minutes. In this time, Gary began to play with the cord of the vacuum. He watched as a buffet of different emotions transitioned across Stan's face, no doubt considering this all. "Well, cool." He shrugged, a light grin playing at his own lips as he stepped forward and pat Gary on the shoulder. His laid-back nature rarely, if ever, betrayed him, and Gary was pleased that he'd fallen for someone who was generally easy going. "I think I need a break from chicks. A-and I always thought you were pretty nice, so... We should. Uh. Try it out." A red haze danced over Stan's cheeks, and Gary grinned ecstatically. "...Anyway! Want to play some video games?"

Gary perked up. "I sure would."

Stan bit his lip as he stared at him for a moment or so more, before he leaned in and kissed Gary's nose. "Awesome."

"Awesome." Gary replied in a daze as the two of them made their way up to Gary's room, where video game playing would most likely _not_ ensue.

**Hope you enjoyed! I'm a huge fan of Stary and want to contribute as much as I can... With a little bit of hinted Scottman too, which may or may not be in reference to my other fic, Pretty Please, and another one that'll some day be published, Slow Dancing in a Burning Room.  
**


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